Timeline | Basic Course

Memory line | Words That Work - Basics

4 Modules | 19 Lessons

Module 1

Creating Awareness

You are able to recognize your own triggers and the triggers of others, and to see them as signs of unmet needs. You have acquired the skills necessary to distinguish between interpretations and observations, and have a better understanding and awareness of yourself and others.

Main features: awareness of blocked connections, use of self-empathyand recognition of your own triggers, empathy for and the understanding of others.

Lesson 1

Taking Care of Yourself

The purpose of this lesson is to help you get started and to accompany you with your learning process of Words That Work, so that it can become an integral part of your life in both professional and personal settings.

Lesson 2

Do You Know Your Triggers?

The purpose of this lesson is to raise your awareness of and perhaps introduce you to a powerful human capacity, known as empathy and self-empathy.

Lesson 3

We Need to Talk About It Now

The purpose of this lesson is to familiarize you with the skill of using silent empathy – to give yourself empathy silently,  without judging or blaming yourself. In doing this, you can keep your focus on what needs the other person might be trying to meet, without analyzing their behavior.

Module 2

Mastering the Learning Cycle

You are familiar with two common communication pitfalls: interpretations and judgments of others and yourself. You have skills to deal with these challenges, and use them as an opportunity to connect with yourself and with others.

Main features: Understanding and celebrating a sense of progress and by the same token mourning mistakes, keeping the learning cycle steady and strengthening it through daily practice

Lesson 4

A Job Welldone

The objective of this lesson is to familiarize you with the process of celebrating, which connects you with your met needs . Celebrating met needs through a learning process can support you in fulfilling your own needs, and the needs of others in a similar future situation.

Lesson 5

This Person Needs Improvement

The purpose of this lesson is for you to become familiarized with the grieving process, which you may use when your needs are unfulfilled. This process will help you to recognize and halt the habitual and culturally typical responses of judging who is right or wrong, who deserves to be rewarded or punished, or who deserves praise or blame.

Lesson 6

Put It In Writing

The purpose of this lesson is for you to become familiarized with the daily exercise of personal celebrations. Such practice is a tangible way to integrate your NVC skills quickly and effectively in your life.

Module 3

Building Competence & Confidence

You have the ability to take on, with more confidence, the things you’ve committed to do. You have expanded your skills in such a way that you have the capacity to transform challenging and escalating conflict situations at home or at your workplace into opportunities for connection.

Main features: recognize and take personal responsibility, increase your overall NVC skills, nurture your willingness to learn and use new skills, create crystal-clear agreements with others.

Lesson 7

Go Ahead, Put Yourself Out There

The purpose of this lesson is to raise your awareness that it takes practice, time and effort to incorporate a new skill before you can use NVC smoothly and fluently. This lesson and the subsequent lessons of Module 3 are all dedicated to effectively support you in this endeavor.

Lesson 8

Why Are You Talking So Weird?

The purpose of this lesson is to help you create an optimal learning environment and gain experience for yourself, so that you can gain more confidence with your NVC skills.

Lesson 9

Permisson to Falter, Please …’

The purpose of this lesson is to assist you in increasing the integration of NVC into your daily life by making agreements with members of your innermost circle.

Lesson 10

“Hold Me Accountable, Please!”

The purpose of this lesson is to support you in asking people in your innermost circle for support. By making agreements with those closest to you, you create clarity and willingness for everyone who wants to support you.

Lesson 11

Taking the Time You Need

The purpose of this lesson is to raise awareness of how to meet your need for empathy by taking a time-out (also known as a “time-in”). You will also become more empowered and aware of how to respond if, for example, you see or hear that a meeting or conversation is on the verge of escalating into conflict.

Module 4

Achieving Your Goals

You are now adept at making clear requests. In making these requests, you acknowledge and move past your own frustration to try and get your needs met and reach your goals.  You also know how to support others to ask for what they need, and are gaining some key skills as both a leader and facilitator

Main features: Asking for what you need, recognizing typical patterns of unclear requests, making clear requests, supporting others to clarify their requests.

Lesson 12

If You Want It, Ask for It

The entirety of Module 4 is dedicated to what we believe is one of the most challenging aspects of NVC: making clear requests. The purpose of this lesson and the following ones is to assist you in fostering the tools to skilfully formulate clear requests. This skill is crucial for you to get what you need and to support others to get what they need.

Lesson 13

Dreams Are Vague, Requests Are Clear

The purpose of this lesson is to raise your awareness that formulating clear requests requires sufficient clarity of your own needs. As clear requests are key to fostering understanding with those around you and increasing the likelihood of receiving what you need, clarity of your own needs is vital.

Lesson 14

Anatomy For a Clear Request

The intent of this lesson is to heighten your perception of the basic distinctions between making requests in the conventional sense and formulating requests using NVC.

Lesson 15

“I can’t Do That!”

The purpose of this lesson is to amplify your evaluative perception regarding whether you’ve made a vague remark or a doable request. The latter increases the likelihood others will actually support you in attaining your goal.

Lesson 16

Tell Me What You Want!

The purpose of this lesson is to increase your understanding about a small but crucial distinction when making requests. That is, requests formulated in action language ask for something you do want instead of what you do not want.

Lesson 17

What Do You Want Right Now?

The purpose of this lesson is to accompany you in increasing your ability to make requests in the present tense. In other words, to ask someone if they are willing to do something that you want to happen right here and now.

Lesson 18

What Type of Request Is That?

The aim of this lesson is to expand the toolbox of skills that you can employ both when formulating requests that verify the quality of the connection between you and others, and when dispelling misconceptions about a request you’ve made.

Lesson 19

Avoiding Ambiguous Requests

The objective of this lesson is to empower you further in your capacity to help others formulate clear requests, aiding you to understand the other party’s wants and needs.

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